Ending The Chore Wars with Bestselling Author Kristin Maschka on The Intentional Parent

Episode 17 : TIP: The Intentional Parent

Episode Synopsis

Tina and Greg are very happy to talk with author Kristin Maschka about keeping your sanity and identity in the transition to parenthood.
From the career and “me”-focused lifestyle, to opening your world to create and care for a family, Kristin gives insight that can be necessary to modern parents for working together as a functioning alliance in raising their children.

Guest Bio

KRISTIN MASCHKA is a best-selling author of “This is Not How I Thought It Would Be: Remodeling Motherhood to Get the Lives We Want Today,” and a consultant with more than 15 years of experience in organization development and change leadership. She brings a fresh perspective and authentic voice to the issues at the heart of family and community life today.
Kristin is an expert on mothers and the social, economic, and cultural forces that impact their lives. She spent four years as the Board President of Mothers & More, a national non-profit dedicated to improving the lives of mothers.
She has authored related articles and commentary for publications such as USA Today Magazine, Womens eNews and the Huffington Post. Print and radio media regularly call on her expertise; USA Today, Money, The Christian Science Monitor, NPR, Marketplace, and BBC London.
Kristin’s experience with public education includes roles as a teacher, parent, community advocate and consulting partner to Superintendents, school districts and foundations.

Episode Breakdown

00:01 Welcome to The Intentional Parent.
00:50 Introducing Kristin Maschka.
01:39 Kristin tells us about why she wrote “This is Not How I Thought it Would Be.”
03:53 What Kristin learned about people’s experience in the “chore wars.”
05:40 Varying appreciation for parenting, both cultural and personal.
06:51 List making and task dividing for running a household.
10:46 A division of labor that works for the family: “Cross-Training.”
13:13 Flexibility in assigning responsibility.
14:30 Coming to terms with different standards between spouses.
16:59 Avoiding a “business-like” relationship-from the men’s perspective.
19:30 How to become a mind-reader and understand unrealistic expectations.
20:48 “The list,” and finding balance in the chore-wars.
22:31 “Is appreciation a part of this too?”
25:53 Gender differences in understanding parenthood.
28:13 “The day the vomit hit the fan.” Early days of motherhood and crisis.
29:54 How men and women react differently to leaving the workplace.
31:32 Avoiding competition for who had the worst day.
33:50 Parents suffering “Identity Whiplash.”
35:20 Date night for yourself.
36:53 Social signals about gender expectations in parenting.
38:47 “Why is identity so important?”
41:12 How social media has changed isolation and the discourse of parenting.
42:07 “The Balcony View,” and looking at our lives as parents.
43:39 Kristin’s book and website.

Additional Links

www.kristinmaschka.com
http://www.kristinmaschka.com/2011/12/14/creating-a-family-vision-part-1

http://www.kristinmaschka.com/remodeling-motherhood

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Hosted By

Dr. Tina Bryson

Dr. Tina Payne Bryson is a lecturer, a parenting consultant, and a therapist at pediatric & adolescent psychology associates. She speaks to groups all across the country and writes for numerous venues, most recently the pbs series “this emotional life.” her book, co-authored with dr. Dan Siegel, is called the whole-brain child: 12 revolutionary strategies to nurture your child’s developing mind. She’s a mom to three school-aged boys.

Greg Matuskiewicz

Greg is a former Microsoft executive and father of a five year old boy. He is a three time Iron man ® triathlete, master gardener and activist parent. Greg enjoys marathon running, surfing and spending time with his wife, Peggi and their son Lincoln.